September 09, 2022

[Must read] How to avoid Heartbreak for yourself


Heartbreak, heart attack
Photo credit: Pinterest

Is there anything like Self-imposed heartbreak? Yes, because more than 60% of ladies I have counseled on relationship problems open up to me that their male church member (brother) are having sex with them! 

This is very serious and painful! Once a lady accepts a proposal from a brother, the sister should let him prove his love for her by taking care of her without sex! Successful courtship requires prayer and wisdom. Any sister who allows her brother to have sex with her during courtship has no wisdom! Such individual is a victim and may soon become a sex slave.

 Unfortunately, no sex slave has ever had a say in any marital relationship! This  means, a brother can freely intimidate a sister who has become his sex slave with a breakup. As a matter of fact, what many sisters are experiencing today in courtship  is sexual slavery and sexual exploitation! Presently, it is true that sisters are more than brothers, but then sisters must be wise enought to say NO to sexual slavery and sexual exploitation! Marriage is not a requirement for making heaven! Do not allow any brother to lead you to hell in the name of courtship. Any brother who can no longer control his sexual urge in courtship should marry immediately!  

Read also: Why you should not go into premarital sex in Relationship

In courtship, God has made woman adorable enough for man to respect and honour!  Absolutely, courtship belongs to women! I was surprised when I observed during my counseling sessions that some ladies are actually slaves in courtship! Why? Because men who are yet to be their husbands are having sex with them.  

A Godly lady is a pacesetter in courtship, but once a sister allows a brother to have sexual intercourse with her, she is devalued! Ladies, do not allow any man to take your position in courtship! Don't sell your birthright to any man in courtship! Man proposes, but woman approves in courtship! So, let every woman remains the Chief Approving Officer (CAO) and man, Chief Proposing Officer (CPO) in courtship! Every sister must be careful not to approve premarital sex with her brother so that she doesn't lose her dominion as CAO! 

Unfortunately, most sisters have lost this position by allowing their brothers to have sex with them in courtship! Of course, in any courtship where the brother has taken over the CAO, the sister will weep and most likely suffer an heartbreak!  So, sisters be warned! When you allow a man to have sex with you without marriage, you are no more the CAO, but the CPO; a messanger position meant for men in courtship! What a disaster!  This is the reason many ladies are now running after brothers begging them to marry them because they have lost the thing that qualifies them as CAO! Many sisters are the one paying for the house rent of those brothers who are yet to marry them. If you are living well and you preserve yourself holy as a lady during courtship, you dont need to entice your brother with any material or financial gift for him to love and marry you! Rather,  your brother will lavish material and financial gifts on you!  

Read also: How to control your Sexual urges as a Christian

Men will continue to take advantage of those sisters who open their legs widely during courtship,  until they learn to obey God and stay clear of sex before marriage! No sane man will leave a sister who is sexually faithful and marry a junk! So, sisters, zip up in courtship! The heart break most sisters are experiencing in courtship today is due to their inability to say NO to premarital sex! The more your brother sleep with you in courtship, the less valuable you become! So, ladies and  sisters, stop self-imposed heartbreak by disallowing brothers (or whatever they call themselves) from sleeping with you in courtship! Say NO to sex before marriage! Say NO to premarital sex and remain an enviable treasure (Prob. 15:6)! If  you allow a man to sleep with you in courtship, you are at his mercy. He may decide to marry you, and he may decide not to marry you! Several sisters have narrated the kind of heartbreak they have suffered from men to me and behold, it was very painful indeed! But funny enough, in most cases, they are the root of their problems.

Many of them allow sex before marriage. Sisters, do not devalue yourselves! Do not make yourselves less relevant in courtship! I tell you, as long as you close your legs, that man will not go because no man wants to lose a treasure! May you not court a man who will turn you to a sex slave! May you not meet a man who will take heaven from you and replace with hell.

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